Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Word Salad - 46

Salad hyenas used before characterizations with mutes and muses alike.
Intuitive, Regional, clandestine and forensic with natural tendencies to forgo the precluded.
Never the only, and not yet the foremost, taken with salt and blemish as are we as we are...
Fortune's smiles and maybe not have befallen down upon your knees knowing rising up is the only answer,
having forgotten the question. Fragments from Venues and Venus either yearning with tartar covered
steak tar tare or some such.
Majestic, future, forlorn and with due respect to the ninja.
You know who you ARE!!!

I do know who I am! And it's someone with no wish to be covered in steak tartare or any other meat.

Thanks to Miss Plumcake for the awesome Mr. Salad.

Monday, September 5, 2011


stomp's her feet like she doesn't care
the wink in her eye tell's the truth
while telling me i should of know it
dancing in the street like a child
dreaming of the day's when she was wild
to bee by my side for the last mile
now at peace she home for a while

PS no pic no reply and
put area in subject

Yes, my little chickadees, your Aunty Jane is back.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

I am saving a place at the table for you : ~) - 57 (SW Burbs ONLY)

I am saving a place at the table for you : ~) - 57 (SW Burbs ONLY)

Throughout history many have said, “Confession is Good for the Soul”. (((LOL))) … However whoever started that saying, has never posted a personal ad on CL before, as that activity can often be compared to a Person Death Wish, … so don’t expect anything too deep here from me (((LOL))).

Furthermore … let’s all start with a valuable piece of communication. If you read an ad that really isn’t asking for you; almost by name, please move on quietly as that writer just did you a favor by not wasting your time.

~~~ Things That May or May NOT Work For Me Are ~~~

[ ] If you are NOT naturally happy, healthy and funny; because I am, … do us both a favor ~ Go Away!

[ ]
If you are wearing granny panties RIGHT NOW, have ever owned more than One Pair of Birkenstocks at any one time or “Smiled Warmly” when someone used the term: BBW (need I really say what that actually means to the guys) while describing you, … that clearly speaks volumes … Go Away!

[ ] If you have ever told anyone; with Great Pride, that you might have prepared for 6-wks. before taking a simple on the spur of the moment trip up to Seattle for possibly just a 3-day weekend … Just Go ~ Go Away and please stop talking about how you simply love the beach, traveling … etc!

[ ] If you live on the eastside of the Willamette River and/or within Portland City limits, … Go Away!

[ ] If are just too darn old and slow to ever happily climb up onto the back of a nice motorcycle with a smile; that is not my fault, … Go Away, … don’t look back, and may you soon be remembered by your friends and family well at your upcoming passing with a nice smile!

[ ]
If you think that being asked to be the next Bingo Captain/Caller on Wednesday nights at the local church is something to look forward to in life, … Please go Away; as I will never be that old!

[ ] If you thought it was Progressively cool; and very~very trendy too, to join the second-coming of the Jim Jones Democrap Family party in Washington DC … you are on your own in my opinion (((LOL)))!!!

[ ]
If; just to add a little more, you haven’t earned your place at the table, … and you can only live within a world where the Obamanation has to cut the legs off of honest, hard working Americans so you can be “seen” as their equal … that is really pathetic! Q: Why should I hand you ½ of my earnings; via your party’s abusive taxes, while you pay nothing at all, while pretending that your progressive socialism is what made America great. Keep in mind, we both have a right to be Free Americans; to do our very best everyday and nothing more. However that does not mean that you have the right to stick your hand in my pocket just whenever you feel like it ~ Get it!

Well, … there is more; there is (((always))) more when it comes to me, and yet the above should get the conversation going. The usual appropriate NONs apply and (((No PIC/ No Chat))) is required too.
As for the 95% or more of those that this ad does not speak; directly, to keep your chin up, your heart open and don’t stop looking, as there is hopefully someone out there for you too. Take care : ~)
Dude, I just don't even...I mean, I bet you're all hairy and dandruffy and fallout-sheltery, and fuck, man, you're making me feel all Holden Caulfield over here. And that is not a good look at my age.

Why do all the good guys finish last??? - 22 (Salem)

I mean exactly what I say, why do we finish last as nice guys. When did it become not cool to comment on how nice a lady looks or open the door for her, or fall asleep talking to her on the phone. This is me in a nutshell. I see couples walking around all the time with the boyfriend being a complete douchebag. I don't get it. Yeah i'm not the best looking guy in the world, but i put forth the effort to make sure that you're happy. My name is Jason, and my friends say I try to be the asshole but deep down in the teddy bear. Bad boy? Yes. Good guy? Yes. I would like to think that i'm a combination of all personalities. Fun, happy, sad, mad, ecsentric, outgoing, shy, whatever. Look i'm not here to make myself out to be the best. But i will try my hardest. I love all kinds of music, Fall Out Boy, Manu Chou, Rocky Horror Picture Show, i could go on but i could go forever.....that's what she said! Anyways i love to go out and experience something new everyday, whether its a different way home or just doing my job differently. I like to go get the occasional drink at the bar or sit in my backyard with a beer and a smoke. Yes i smoke cigerettes, although i am 420 friendly as well. Anyways, if you wanna know more, i am an open book so just ask, i just wanna meet someone who is chill and relaxed, who likes to go out or stay under the covers and cuddle. That wont judge me. That laugh alot and just be themselves. AND PLEASE PUT IN YOUR SUBJECT LINE WHAT YOUR FAVORITE BAND IS PLEEEEASE

Kids, your Auntie was a child in Salem. And it was a glorious place to be a child-- wonderful parks, libraries, safe streets to play.... I moved away when I was eleven.

Whenever I meet someone who grew up there they always say "Yeah, there's just nothing to do but beer and meth." So that's why you're finishing last, Jason. YOU'RE IN FUCKING SALEM. And we won't even mention the doucheface. Go Away!

Friday, January 22, 2010

Star seed looking for his other half

Star seed looking for his other half - 26 (Earth)

We are all 'star seeds', or 'star people' as we all have lived in many realities in many planetary systems and in higher realms as other life forms. So here we are, star seeds, souls sparks on a mission, trapped for NOW in a physical experience.

Starseeds allegedly seed planets with information and spiritual frequency when one cycle of time is about to end and another begin. As planetary frequency increases, so too does their levels of awareness, and need to help others, and return to their natural state of being, a soul spark of light.

There is little connection to the mainstream systems of society, religious, political or economic. Creativity is the key to spiritual fulfillment and mission.

Many prefer to work only in the esoteric fields - healing, searching for their own truths and their soul mission through studying systems of higher wisdom, writing their biographies as a means of clearing issues and understanding their work here and now.

They await a great awakening the evolution of consciousness through the alchemy of time. They know that no one has the date for us to move into levels of higher frequency but their souls tell them that it is on the horizon. They are programmed to find others like themselves, as based on similar frequencies and predestined agendas.......................

I know your out there, I feel it. If Any one understands this AT ALL. Contact me.

All we have is NOW

It's true! I am writing my biography as a means of clearing issues! Such as how it really is all my mother's fault, and how my ex-boyfriend is a massive tool, rather than having one. I'm really looking forward to having this all sorted.


Starseed, thank you for sharing this galactically awesome wisdom with me.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

person of interest is interested in you - 56 (give attention get attention)

person of interest is interested in you - 56 (give attention get attention)

I am writing to just you. Why? You are the only one here. You are the one funny, smart, nice woman all wrapped up in a Tiffphony box on C/L.
Me? The luckiest guy in the world to spend time
with you.
Gooble. Gooble.
You will see me at the parade. I will be my own float.

1) I have to say, Tiffphony is GENIUS. We all know those women, am I right?

2) Gooble? This just makes me think of turkey time in Gigli. Bleargh.

3) Aren't we all our own floats, really, when it co
mes right down to it?

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Winner, Winner Chicken Dinner

Another lame round-up post, sorry kiddiewinks. School's kicking my butt this term. Anyhoo..

I want to smell you fart - 30

Hi, I am fairly new to the area, attractive guy, 30, and would like to find a fun woman to enjoy time with.

Seriously, dude? That's the best you can do?

38 Years Old Never Kissed a Girl - 39

Looking for a Woman, must be at Least 28 Years old and Less than 50.

Must posses a Mountain Bike or something similar for easy rides up and down the Fire roads of Forest Park.

Must like to have Beer afterwards or enjoy a go
od glass of wine or take a 420 break, it doesn't bother me.

I think I'm gonna need something stronger than a beer.

chrastian man - 41

I like to go to church, I love God. I have jus t finished my first Book it is about about Jesus. I like to ride horses, quads, and spend time out doors. if you like what you see sofar drop me a line.

Honey, sweetie, darlin', don't you think if you're such a good Christian, maybe you should learn how to spell it?

For extra schadenfreude, all these men are from my actual dating pool!

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Gorgeous Man Seeks Ugly Woman

I'm tired of dating beautiful yet shallow women, who only go out with me because I am extremely good-looking.

When I go out for beers with my friends (who are better, more interesting people than I), hot women will approach only me -- never my friends. I'm sick of it. So I resolve to date only ugly women. I don't care if you're fat, handicapped, a burn victim, old, or Puerto-Rican. You just have to have a great personality. Please send a photo so I can be sure you're not a supermodel.

Please respond with UGLY in the subject line so I know you're not a spammer.
Even Puerto Rican girls, huh? Well, that's mighty white of you. Your momma must be so proud.